CLEVELAND — Phone addiction, bad social manners, swearing or throwing fits. One of the biggest topics discussed on the Mom Squad Facebook page is "rude kids," especially teens. On today's Mom Squad, Dr. Kim Bell with the Hanna Perkins Center for Child Development explains what we are misunderstanding about teens.
“These questions are asked like, ‘How do I get my teen to do this?' 'How do I get my teen to do that?'" says Bell.
“My first question is, well what did they say when you talk to them about it? And a lot of parents will be like, ‘Well, I haven't actually talked to them about it because I don't know what to do about it,'" Bell said.
Dr. Bell says it’s hard to make or force a teenager or child to do anything because you will be met with a lot of resistance.
“If you try to make your teenager do something, what's happening is you're trying to maintain control at a time when your teenager is trying to push off and be ready to be their own person in the world. And so there is a natural tendency for things to clash,” explains Bell.
“Teenagers go against family norms; they try things out, they push the boundaries. Your job is to be like those bumpers in bumper bowling, you know, and sort of like smoosh them back into the center of where you want them to be. But if you are under this idea of like, ‘Well, I can somehow get compliance and control and quiet,' you're not going to get what you want, especially not with this generation," Bell explains.
So how do you get your child, no matter what age, to learn how to be polite in social situations? And how can you do it without the fight? You can catch the entire interview with Dr. Kim Bell on Mom Squad, which is streaming on WKYC Plus. Find it on Roku, Apple or Fire TV, on our WKYC YouTube page, or in the media player below.
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