CLEVELAND — The days of denial are long over. Horrific situations like we saw Monday in Nashville can happen anywhere, but how you explain that to kids is a delicate balance of honesty and age-appropriate language.
Dr. Stephen Sroka, adjunct assistant professor at the Case Western Reserve School of Medicine and president of Health Education Consultants, has seven tips for parents when they need to talk to their kids about difficult situations:
- Monitor the news — be aware of what's on the tv when little ones are around or in ear shot
- Keep routines, because it helps give kids a sense of normalcy and security
- Assure kids that they are safe
- Control your emotions — your kids are watching how you react to things, and they will likely follow your lead
- Model good behavior
- Offer age-appropriate explanations
- Look, listen, and speak with hope, honesty, and kindness
When it's time to talk to your kids, put down the phone, shut off the TV, and listen to them. Most schools already practice and prepare for shooting scenarios but teach kids that they can also have a say in safety.
"Teach them that if they see something, say something," Sroka told 3News. "If they see someone getting bullied, someone getting hurt, or someone coming into the school who shouldn’t be there, they should say something, because what you're doing is empowering them with some control over a situation."
Elementary school-age kids are going to ask more questions, so keep answers simple and honest. Say something like, "A bad person or someone with a serious illness, who was angry, hurt people." It also may be easier to include others in the conversation, such as another family with children the same age.
Also, focus on the heroes — the teachers and first responders who came to help, the community that gave support, the love and kindness shared by others for the families who lost loved ones, and the survivors who lived through the ordeal.