CLEVELAND — By his early 30s, Jason Toth had built a successful marketing company, but seemingly out of nowhere, he started dealing with what he calls "bizarre health issues."
"I was really exhausted all the time. I had this intense brain fog that made it difficult to think," he told 3News in a recent interview. "And in August of 2019, I was outside gardening and when I stood up I got super, super dizzy, and my legs gave out and I fell to the ground."
Toth recalls also battling severe vertigo, and for weeks, the symptoms clung to him.
"I kept on getting told, 'Well, it's anxiety. It's depression," he recalled. "Take this pill, take that pill."
Then, finally, a breakthrough: A neurologist at Cleveland Clinic recognized his symptoms. Jason was diagnosed with POTS, or postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome, a condition impacting heart rate and that can also affect the autonomic nervous system.
"[My doctor] said there's no cure, but it's manageable," Toth said. "You have these periods of feeling OK, and then as soon as you overextend yourself, it's like your nervous system just says, 'Nope.'"
Jason says he lost his identity when he had to shut the doors on Toth Marketing.
"With the cognitive effects I was having, I couldn't deliver," he lamented. "I put all of myself into it, and then it was gone."
So Jason decided to notice what didn't drain him, and started paying attention to his thoughts and his imagination. Those thoughts took him back to fond memories with his grandparents, and their art collection. That's when he found his passion again.
His art form became photography, with his lens focused on his hometown.
"One day, I made a piece that changed everything, and I sat back and I cried and I realized, 'This is what I'm going to do,'" he said. "It's [a photograph] of the giant willow tree down at Edgewater Park."
Toth still remembers exactly what he was feeling when he took that photo.
"It was October of 2022, and I was having a really rough day. I was very depressed, it was gray outside, it was wet, it was cold."
After developing the photo, he saw the color that could exist beyond the grayness. He added it, and in doing so, his talent came alive.
"I'm staring at this explosion of color that's so vibrant and so beautiful," he recalled, "and I was so moved by it I started crying. I wrote down the title of the piece right then and there, and it came to me as 'Renewal of my spirit.'"
That title felt familiar to him, and a few months later — after his beloved grandmother was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer — he realized why.
"I went to my last Shabbat service with her at our temple," Jason said. "She was sitting between my brother and I and we were holding her hands. And there's a prayer called Mi Sheberach, and there's a line where it goes where, 'We're praying for the renewal of our body and the renewal of our spirit.' I'm like, 'Oh my God, this is my Mi Sheberach.'"
It happened just in time.
"[Before she passed away,] my grandmother got to see me say, 'I'm going to be an artist,'" Toth remembered. "And she goes ‘Jason, you've always been an artist,' and that was one of the last things she ever said to me."
A successful new career, but a reset that started with his identity shredded, before it was pieced back together with a deeper purpose and appreciation.
"I wouldn't have been driven to bold, vibrant color if I wasn't living through a very dark moment of my life," he admitted. "When your identity shatters, you're left with your authentic self."
You can buy Jason's art on his website jtoth.art and at his store at City Goods in Ohio City. You can also follow him on social media on Instagram and Facebook.
Jason will be announcing the permanent retirement of many of his current artworks to make way for a brand new collection this summer. Follow him on social media and sign up for his newsletter to be the first to find out what pieces and purchase them before they’re gone for good.
If you’re interested in buying custom/commission pieces, special orders, or art for your corporate space, you can email Jason at jason@jtoth.art.