CLEVELAND — When Michelle Bell lost her son, 33-year-old Andre Brown, she felt pain no parent — no mother should ever feel.
"I still wake up in the middle of the night," Michelle says. "I don't want another person to have to do that. Its that 4 or 5 o clock time frame when the first call came then I didn't answer…"
It was February 10, 2019. Andre and a friend were driving through their neighborhood on Cleveland's east side when they were shot and killed, just a block away from their home.
The suspect is still at large.
"The things that I remember, that I hold onto that keeps me moving forward is that he always laughed," Michelle adds. "I can hear him say,'I'm proud of what you're doing to make some change'"
Justice for Andre is what Michelle wants. But she also hopes for change.
Change she knows won't happen overnight.
"To me, Cleveland, born and raised here, we are better than the negative national news that we continuously get," says Michelle. "And what impacts Cleveland also touches Rocky River, Beachwood, Solon, it touches all those surrounding suburbs."
Michelle believes a more powerful weapon is needed to fight the battle against gun violence — one she knows she can't fight alone.
"Can we do something to change the way the laws are written? Can we change the relationship between law enforcement and the community? So people can get along better, it's a combination of all that that gives me the drive, energy and fuel to keep doing the work that I'm doing," Michelle explains.
So she created M-PAC Cleveland, a non-profit focused on more prayer, activity, and conversation.
"I decided, 'okay let's pull everybody together' and I know when you work collaboratively or in a group effort, the work is going to get done a lot faster and its going to have a bigger impact," Michelle says.
M-PAC Cleveland members get together, have conversations, and support each other. "Hold one another up and have a safe space so you can say whatever you want," Michelle adds. "Do whatever you need to do in that space with people that are kind of feeling the same thing you were feeling. It just helps in this grief process."
Coming together as a community through conversation, education and encouragement.
"We can cut back the number of times someone has to get that phone call or knock at the door," Michelle says. "We want to do that and there's so many people that are impacted in our community moreso than anywhere else."
M-PAC Cleveland is now a part of the coalition "Together We Rise," which includes 30 local and national groups like Cleveland Peacemakers and Moms Demand Action that work together to fight against gun violence in the community.
"M-PAC Cleveland is we want to change the narrative of what people think about Cleveland," says Michelle, proudly. "There was once a saying, 'the best location in the nation.' I think we need to get back to that!"
It's with that hope that Michelle pushes forward, helping others just like her grieve, seek justice and search for answers. Most importantly, they educate.
"With the drive, the motivation, determination from the individuals that are a part of this group, this nucleus, we will lead the nation in crime reduction and we believe that. We just have to come together to make that happen," Michelle adds.
It's hope she uses in the moment to fight against what took Andre away. Hope to keep his legacy alive. And hope, paired with prayer and action that will take gun violence out of Cleveland while keeping loved ones close.