CLEVELAND — When you become a parent, chances are, you would do anything to keep your child from being in pain -- whether that's physical pain, emotional pain, or psychological pain. We think that will help give them a leg up, whether it's in sports, in school or just in life in general. But should we let our kids fail?
"I think our instincts are to want our kids to have a blissful, you know, carefree life that nothing goes wrong and then that almost, well, pretty much never happens," says Dr. David Miller, a pediatrician with University Hospitals.
Dr. Miller spoke with 3News' Maureen Kyle for the Mom Squad Pod Podcast. The two addressed how to help your kids start dealing with failure from a young age.
Dr. Miller says that praising your child's effort rather than the outcome will get your child to try hard.
"Even if they fail, the win is that they tried hard, you know. And then that sets them up for being able to win, essentially, even when they fail a little bit," he said.
So what about that participation trophy movement?
"I've heard a lot of parents against that theory of, you know, 'good job, you got the participation trophy!' But does that fly in the face of praising the effort? I mean, where do you walk that line?" Kyle asked Dr. Miller.
"I think that is a tough line to walk. There's this idea of ultimate fairness and everybody gets kind of the same thing, regardless of what happens," said Dr. Miller. "And then there's sort of, more of a recognition of when someone actually achieves. And I'm more of praising the kids for their participation, praising them for their effort. But just because every kid participated, didn't mean they put forth a good effort."
Kyle and Dr. Miller also spoke about everything from teaching your child how to work harder for a better grade they may be struggling to reach, how to be a good sport when they do end up losing, and also what to say to your kids when they're faced with a bully. You can hear all of that and more on the Mom Squad Pod Podcast, wherever you download your podcasts.
EDITOR'S NOTE: The video in the player below is from a previous Mom Squad Pod episode.